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PostPosted: Friday, September 24th, 2010 - 08:13:11 
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Joined: Thursday, August 06th, 2009 - 05:45:53
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Favorite Character(s): Buster Bunny and Fifi La Fume
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This is from a first person point-of-view.


It all started on an early Monday morning. Now that another weekend went by, I was ready to begin another fulfilling week at school. Before I got out of bed, I was looking at a picture of Fifi and myself at the Prom. Oh, the fun and loving we had together. Which is why I was going to ask her for a date. As soon as I left the house and went to school, I saw that Buster and Babs were already there. "Hi, Hamton.", said Babs. "What's shakin', bacon?", asked Buster. "Well, guys, today's the day that I'm finally gonna ask Fifi La Fume out on a date." "Wow, that's great!", said Babs. "We wish you the best of luck.", said Buster. "Thanks, guys, I'll need it." The bell rang and my friends and I made our way to class.


While Professor Fudd was busy giving a lecture to the class, I couldn't help but stare at Fifi, who was sitting two desks in front of me. I know it was rude of me to do that, but she's so beautiful. I knew that by the end of the day, when I ask her out with me, she would be happy to say yes. While I was busy daydreaming, Professor Fudd called on me. "Am I boring you with my lecture, Hamton?" "No, sir. Not at all.", I said with a sheepish grin. Everyone looked at me and started snickering. Fifi looked at me as well and smiled and giggled. I would do anything to have a girl like her in my life. The bell rang, indicating the end of the first class.


Now that I had a little bit of free time before the next class began, I roamed the hallway for a little while and then I noticed that Fifi was going to her locker. My thoughts were "Ok, you can do this ,Hamton ol' boy. Just ask her out like you did the last time." As I walked toward her, I was sweating like crazy, my heart was pounding rapidly, and I was shaking." When she was trying to open her locker, the moment of truth had come. "Um... Fifi? I..." But before I could continue my sentence she smiled at me again. I couldn't help but go gaga over her smile. "Is zhere something vous wanted to wanted to ask moi?", she asked with that wonderful accent of hers. I finally snapped out of it and asked her. "Uh, yeah. If you're not doing anything this week or this weekend, I was wondering if you would like to go out on another date with me."


To be continued...

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PostPosted: Friday, September 24th, 2010 - 16:14:42 
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Joined: Sunday, October 19th, 2008 - 11:22:34
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Not a bad start. It seems to need a little work, but I don't think I've ever done a first-person narrative before, so I'm not exactly sure what to do to it. Maybe it just doesn't quite sound like Hamton to me. I'm not sure. I'm not used to reading first-person narratives, either, so that could be part of what's throwing me off.

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PostPosted: Friday, September 24th, 2010 - 16:18:51 
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Tiny Toon
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Joined: Thursday, August 06th, 2009 - 05:45:53
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Favorite Character(s): Buster Bunny and Fifi La Fume
Framwinkle wrote:
Not a bad start. It seems to need a little work, but I don't think I've ever done a first-person narrative before, so I'm not exactly sure what to do to it. Maybe it just doesn't quite sound like Hamton to me. I'm not sure. I'm not used to reading first-person narratives, either, so that could be part of what's throwing me off.


Just think of it as one of the main characters doing the narrating.

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PostPosted: Friday, October 01st, 2010 - 13:34:46 
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Tiny Toon
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Joined: Thursday, August 06th, 2009 - 05:45:53
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Favorite Character(s): Buster Bunny and Fifi La Fume
Part 2:

Fifi thought about it for a brief moment and then she said, "I will have to think about eet. It shall be a few before I give vous moi decision" "OK, that's fine.", I said. "I'll see ya later." When I walked away from her, I saw that Buster and Babs were waiting for me at the end of the hallway. "So, what did she say?", Buster asked. "Did she say yes?", Babs asked too. "She said she would think about it.", I said disappointedly. Babs then put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Aw, that's OK, Hamton. Just give her time to make a decision." "You're right, Babs. I'll wait a day or two before she gives me an answer." The bell rang. "That's the spirit, buddy.", said Buster with enthusiasm. "Come on, let's go to our next class.

As the week was going by, I could feel myself getting more and more anxious about getting her answer. Then Friday came and I demanded that she told. When lunchtime came, I entered the cafeteria and I could see that she was sitting at one of the tables with her lunch and her friends Babs and Shirley. I sprinted toward to where the three were sitting, but I was hoping that Babs and Shirley wouldn't be there. Because I mostly like just having a conversation with just one person. I don't really like it when two or more people listen in. It just shows how shy I am. Anyway, as soon as I went to the girls' table they all stared at me. I took a deep breath and let out a big sigh. I didn't want to show Fifi how furious I was. She would've thought different of me. "Um...Fifi, you know it is Friday and I still haven't got an answer from you." She smiled at me,and said sweetly, "Of course I will go out vous." "I mean, is it because you don't like me or something? If that's true, then just me. Otherwise..." after I stopped babbling, I asked her a question. "What did you say?" "I said I would be glad to go out with vous. Pick me up at 7:30 tonight." "Uh-huh.", I said in a dazed voice. She kissed me right on the cheek and left the cafeteria with her lunch-box. "All right, Hamton!", said Babs cheerfully. "This is like, totally cool!", said Shirley with joy, "It certainly is.", I said to myself.

To be continued...

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PostPosted: Friday, October 01st, 2010 - 13:48:37 
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Congratulations, Hamton! :)

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PostPosted: Friday, October 08th, 2010 - 18:33:07 
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Joined: Thursday, August 06th, 2009 - 05:45:53
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Location: Georgia
Favorite Character(s): Buster Bunny and Fifi La Fume
Conclusion:

I arrived at Fifi's home at 7:30 exactly. I knocked on her door and shouted "Fifi, it's me! Ready to go?" "Oui! Do not fear, my dear, Fifi La Fume is here!" I escorted her out of the Acme Junkyard, and as we were walking down the sidewalk, we discussed our plans for that night. "Where shall we go, Hamton?" And without hesitation, I suggested, "Well, the carnival is in town tonight, would you like to go there?" "Oui, let us go!!" She got so excited, that she started running to the carnival while still holding me by the arm.

When we came to the ticket booth at the carnival, I found out from the person running the booth that the tickets were $35.00 each. At outrageous as that seemed, I was still willing to pay for the tickets. After all, Fifi was worth it. Then we were walking throughout the carnival trying to figure out what to do first. Fifi was holding my hand and said "What shall we do first, amore?" "Can we get something to eat first? I'm starving!" Fifi smiled and nodded at me, and we walked over to where the shack where the pizza was being sold. I ordered a large pepperoni pizza and a large Coke with two straws for the both of us. We sat down at one of the empty tables and enjoyed our meal. While we were both sipping on the Coke, we gave each other a romantic gaze in each other's eyes. After we finished our pizza and our drink, we let the food settle for a while before we went on any rides. Soon we decided to ride something, but what? "I know!" Fifi said excitedly, Let us ride ze roller-coaster! "Do you think we should?" I asked nervously. "Oui, now come on!" She took me by the arm and dragged me to the roller-coaster. I looked at the long line of people waiting to get on the roller-coaster and then I said with amusement, "Oh, darn! Look at the huge line! I guess we'll have to find something else to ride." But before I could turn the other direction, the guy operating the roller-coaster looked at us and said "You two lovebirds are in luck! We have a deal where couples can ride without waiting in line! Come on down!" Again, Fifi dragged me to the ride and we went on it. The other people went on the rides too and the operator started it. As soon as the ride began, I was starting to feel very sick and we haven't even been to the top of the coaster yet. When we reached the very top, I threw up on a man, who was at the very bottom, waiting to get on the roller-coaster. He was very angry. All of us went down the coaster, through some loops, and some twists and turns. Everyone was screaming for joy during the ride, so was I, but I was really screaming in terror. The ride finally came to a close and everyone was laughing in happiness. So was Fifi. "Was that not fun, Hamton?" She said as she tried to comfort me. "No it wasn't.", I said still feeling a little sick. "Can we please go on a ride that's a little better?" I begged her. "Of course.", she giggled. We went on a ride that I just we were both going to enjoy: The Love Tunnel.

During the ride, we were both admiring the beauty of the tunnel. Fifi sat very close to me and wrapped one arm around my body, and rested the other one on my leg. I put my arm around her neck. While the ride was still in motion, I expressed my true feelings toward Fifi. "Fifi?" "Oui, Hamton?" "I love you." "I love you, too." Then we closed our eyes and kissed each other softly. And that kiss lasted until the end of the ride. The night was still young and we were still having such a great time at the carnival. I tried and played some games so I could win a prize for Fifi, and after playing seven different games I ended up winning a giant panda bear for her. She thought that I was the greatest for doing it.

Soon, the lights were going up and everyone was heading home. So were we. While I was walking Fifi home she told that had a great time and told her that I did too and I hope we can go out again real soon. She said she'd be happy to go out with me because I really know how to treat a lady. We were almost at her house until we saw someone in the dark, who appeared to be a bully. He showed himself in the light and it was that guy I threw up on while riding the roller-coaster. He was an angry badger looking for revenge. "You!", he pointed and snarled at me. "You're the same punk that threw up on me. I tried to back away from him. "I didn't mean to! Honest! I'm really sorry!" "'Sorry?' You ain't sorry yet, pal, but I'm gonna make you sorry you messed with me! So say your prayers, pig!" While he approaching me, I begged him not to hurt me, and then Fifi unleashed her powerful stink and made the relentless badger go pale. "AHHH!!!! SKUNK!!!" He screamed as he ran away. Fifi checked up on me. "Are vous okay, Hamton?" "Yeah, thanks to you."

We finally made it to Fifi's house. "Thanks for taking moi out tonight, Hamton." "Thanks for letting me take you tonight, Fifi." I placed my hands in hers and politely kissed her on the cheek. We said goodnight to each other and I told her that I would see her in school on Monday. On my way home, I just kept thinking about what a magical evening this was and couldn't wait to tell everyone about it at school on Monday.

The end.

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Last edited by Fifilover on Saturday, October 09th, 2010 - 07:15:22, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Saturday, October 09th, 2010 - 06:56:20 
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Wow, really nice story.

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